Core Conditions of Interpersonal Relations

As I near the end of my college career and am faced with the thought of re-entering the work force, reflecting on Carl Rogers' Three Essentials reminds me of everything I hated about having a career. I worked in a pretty cutthroat industry where backs were stepped on to get ahead and corners were cut everywhere to save a buck. Working with others requires cooperation, and if embodied, the Three Key Essentials could contribute to an extremely effective team. In this case, people were disingenuous, unemphatic and without unconditional positive regard because their own advancement was more important than a civil work environment.

Genuineness is defined as openness and honesty in regards to one's feelings, needs and ideas. This is absolutely necessary to maintain a civil work environment. If people cannot communicate how they are feeling in regards to their work, they may not be able to work effectively as a team. The feng shui of a team is very important in that the team members must understand one another. This may be in regards to being able to rely on others that they will complete their end of the work, or even knowing when somebody is having a rough day and to give them space and pick up their slack, as you know they would do for you.

Unconditional positive regard is difficult to achieve, especially at work. You are going to work with people you don't like. No way around it. The key to non-possessive love is to look for redeeming qualities in the person. If they rub you the wrong way but get work done, then just appreciate them for their hard work. If somebody is not carrying their weight and that is what makes it difficult for you to hold them in unconditional positive regard, perhaps you could find a way to diplomatically approach them about the situation by letting them know how it makes you feel.

Empathy is, I think, the hardest of the three essentials to achieve. It is, however, the most important one for a manager or supervisor to master. It is vital for us as humans to be able to comprehend that everybody has their own frame of reference and is playing the hand that they were dealt. We can hope that everybody is playing that hand to the best of their abilities but such is not always the case. It is especially important for managers and supervisors to practice empathy. Things happen in people's lives and work cannot and should not be every person's main priority for 100% of their lives. Buses may run late, tires may go flat, loved ones may run ill. Some flexibility, within reason, should be practiced to maintain a happy, loyal and productive staff